troubled pregnancy
by peeta29katniss
Summary: Katniss is pregnant and finds out she and Peeta are going back into the arena.How is she going to protect Peeta and their baby at same time?Can she protect them,both?Does she have to choose?Which she will choose? Katniss' POV
1. Chapter 1

**A.N. my first fanfic so I hope you like it, I am writting this fanfiction with my friend,her account is thaliavamps28** **so follow her,I also want to warn that I'm not english or american netheir my friend and this fanfiction may be with some grammar mistakes**.**We're just doing this because we love the books and the movies of The Hunger Games. Review and favourite!  
**

Winter was always the worse season in District 12 for my family and basically for every family. Since it was cold I wouldn't catch much game. And the little amount of game I got was barely enough to sell and get sufficient money to feed my family.

But now since the games ended and I came back home I didn't need to worry about starvation. I still hunt but it's mostly too help Gale's family and other families from my district. Peeta does the same but instead of game he gives pastries and bread he bakes.

Everything was going well for me but there was always a tiny part of brain that was always thinking of one special night on the train back to district 12 from the Victory Tour.

* * *

_**Flashback**_

"AHHHHH!" I wake up screaming from a horrible nightmare again. This time I watched while the mutant dogs from the arena slowly took out parts of Peeta's body. The worst was hearing his painful screams as they teared him apart until there was nothing left.

I sit up, light the lamp beside my bed and put my legs on the side of it ready to stand up. But before I can stand up, Peeta apears at the door of my room alarmed. He looks me over to cofirm that I'm not hurt.

"Are you okay? What's wrong, Katniss? I heard you screaming." He asks nervously.

"I'm okay, Peeta. It was just a nightmare as usual." I reply trying to get my breath regular again. His shoulders go down, he's clearly relieved that it not something worse but he still looks sad because I know he doesn't like when I have nightmares just as I don't like when he has it too. Even though most of the times I can't tell when he's having a nightmare.

"Do you want me to stay?" He asks walking towards my bed. He already knows what my answer is but I still nod. I raise the sheets for him to lay down next to me and put my head on his chest to hear his heartbeat. He puts his arms around me and looks at ceiling.

"What are you thinking about?"I question him. He turns me to face me and stares at me for long time.

"Katniss..." Peeta puts his hand on my cheek and strokes it gently. "I love you so much." I feel heat rising to my cheeks and break our intense stare. I look down not knowing what to say or do. I don't need to say anything because Peeta still hasn't finished what he wants to say. "I know you don't feel the same as me but I know you care about me enough to not wanting to kill me in that arena. I just want to tell you that I know this but I will keep taking care of you and protect you with all I've got and I will never stop loving you."

I raise my head to watch him and find tears in his eyes. I can feel his sadness and my heart is breaking and hurting. I do the only thing I think that can relieve both our pains. I kiss him.

He doesn't kiss me back first but after a few seconds he kisses me back. I start to feel that same hunger I felt in the cave. His lips are soft and spongy. He smells like roses mixed with cinnamon. He's the most delicious scent I have ever smelled and I just want to smell him forever and ever.

Suddenly he pushes me back. I look at him confused. "What's wrong?" I ask.

"Why are you doing this? Why now?" He strikes back.

I stop a little to think what I'm doing. I'm kissing Peeta but why? Is it because I love him? Is it because he's sad?

I say the only thing I know that I'm sure. "Because I care about you." And I kiss him again. And again. And again. And again.

The kisses turn to touches. And slowly we make love.

That's the moment that I know.

I'm a goner.

_**Flashback ends**_

* * *

After we came back home we didn't talk much but almost every night he would come to my house and we would fall asleep. But then I started getting sick and I said to Peeta to not come to my house until I'm better. The problem is that two months later I was still throwing up and I've started to notice some changes in my body like my hips and my breasts are larger and I've gained a little bit of weight, my face is rounder.

It's winter in district 12 now and though it is cold, my hands are shaking for another reason.

The object in my hands is saying the word positive and I can't believe that I'm pregnant, with Peeta Mellark's baby, the boy with the bread.

I don't know what I'm feeling. Am I sad?Am I happy? What should I be? I never wanted kids and now here I am with the little object saying that I'm carrying a child.

"Katniss! Are you okay? You've been in there for a long time now." My mom asks me from the other side of the bathroom door.

"Yeah, just a minute." How am I gonna tell Peeta? Should I keep this baby? No,of course not, I mean, not with the games. I'm so confused, I don't know if I laugh, smile or cry!

When I'm out, my mom is waiting for me and I know she knows that I'm upset. I wanna tell her, I want her to help me, to be by my side but I can't, not with the fear that she's going to leave me again.

She doesn't say anything, just takes me to my room. I lay in bed and drift off to sleep.

* * *

When I wake up, I decide that I should tell Haymitch about the baby, maybe he will know what to do.

I dress for the day and go to Haymitch's house. "Haymitch!? Haymitch!?" I knock on his door. Nothing, he's probably pass out somewhere in his house.

The door is unlock as usual. I enter the house and I feel bile rising up my throat because of the intense smell of alchool and vomit, I got used to the smell but now that I'm pregnant I feel really sick.

I found him lying on his kitchen floor and swear I almost throw up on him but luckily I run fast enough to the bathroom. I puke more than I thought I would and hear Haymitch groaning.

"I HOPE YOU'RE NOT PUKING ON MY FLOOR WHOEVER YOU ARE!" Haymitch shouts.

Then I hear footsteps and look behind me.

Haymitch sees me and looks at me suprised."What the hell are you doing on the bathroom floor, sweetheart?"

"That's why I'm here, to talk to you" I say as I stand up from the floor, go to the sink to wash my mouth and follow Haymitch to the living room.

Haymitch sits on the sofa and I sit opposite of him.

We stay in silence for while until Haymitch breaks it."So...you're here to talk to me. About what?"

I take a deep breath and let it out.

"I'm pregnant"

Haymitch stays silence with a look on his face that I can't read.

"Is it Peeta's?" asks Haymitch

"Of course!" I say loud "Who would it be?"

"I was just asking"murmurs Haymitch "What are you going to do? Are you going to tell him ?"

"I don't know that's why I came here you to tell me what to do."

"Well,you've got a big problem there, sweetheart.I tell you what. First you need to tell Peeta and then we'll go from there."

"I'm going to tell him tonight, at dinner"I say

"Do you need me to come?"

"Yes, I don't know how Peeta is going to react"

"I think he will be happy to know the girl he loved since forever is carrying his child."

"I hope so"


	2. Chapter 2

**A.N. Me and my friend couldn't believe that just a few hours after we had published ****the story** **we already had 1 you and here's the chapter.**

**Chapter 2**

It's 6 p.m. and I am walking with Haymitch to Peeta's house, I don't know what to expect.I'm nervous as hell.

We walk to his door and I knock on it. A few seconds later he opens it with a big smile spread across his face that makes me be less nervous and stay silence for a while just looking at each other. I can not look away from him, like I'm trapped in his eyes.

"Can we come in already?You two have been staring at each other for a long time and I'm starving!"says Haymitch ending the moment.

"Of course. Where are my manners?Come in my guests."says Peeta with a capitol accent.

"Thank you sir!"I say with the accent too.

"You welcome, my lady"

"End the mushy stuff!"groans Haymitch passing by us. I make a shy smile.

"What's for dinner?Smells good" I say trying to changing the subject.

"Lamb stew with dried plums."says Peeta with a grin on his face.

I smile at the mention of my favourite dish. We go to the kitchen and I see that Peeta already put the things in the table so we sit.I fill my plate with food noticing that I'm really hungry, I guess it's because of the pregnancy.

"Katniss,I heard you have something to tell Peeta"I glare at Haymitch while Peeta looks at me.

"Peeta, I need to tell you something"Wait, before I tell him I need to know one thing"Peeta, if I was pregnant how would you feel about it?"

"I don't know. Are you?"

I look down and respond "yes" Peeta puts his hand on my chin and makes me look at his beautiful blue eyes.

"Are you serious?"he asks.

"Yes,I'm pregnant. Are you mad?"I ask

He gives me a sweet smile and says"Of course not,I'm happy. No. I'm more than happy, I'm ecstatic. I don't believe we're going to have a baby, Katniss. I love you so much!"He says spinning me around the room.

At that moment, I can't stop the tears from falling from my eyes and the smile of appearing on my face.

Suddenly,Peeta releases me, kneels down and puts his hands in my belly "I love you too, baby" he says.

"I guess you finally put the bun in the oven"Haymitch says. I almost forgot about him.

"I guess so"Peeta says laughing.

* * *

We go to the living room and sit on the sofa, then the TV turns on and we see Caeser Flickerman "Hello!"he says smiling widely "The time has come to know what this year's games gonna be. As you all know this year we celebrate the third Quarter let's pass the emission to President Snow."

Next we see President Snow holding a paper "Now we honor our third Quarter the 75th anniversary as a reminder to the rebels that even the strongest among them cannot overcome the power of the Capitol, the male and female tributes are to be reaped from the existing pool of victors."

At first I don't understand what he means but then I realize that I'm going back into the arena. With the father of my child. Peeta won't let Haymitch and me go back into the arena together because he loves Haymitch and he has become part of our family and most of all because Peeta wants to go to the arena to protect me and the baby.

That's what he will do. I will try to protect him too.

Because that's what we do.

We protect each other.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Today is the reaping and I'm not in a really good mood, to not talk about my big belly. I'm only 5 months but it seems like I'm 9. I went out to see Haymitch because he was really drunked yesterday. I put myself in a blue jumpsuit and black boots and go to the kitchen I see that Peeta has made me breakfast, orange juice and cheese buns.

Mom and Prim are out too, they're already waiting the reaping to begin.

I remember when I told them about the baby.

**Flashback**

"I can't do this, I can't do this, I can't do this..."I say. Peeta takes my hand.

"We can do this.I'm here with you. We're in this together."He says.

"You're too good for me"I say.

"No, you are too good for me"Peeta says.

"Let's just agree on disagreeing"I say.

"Okay"He says and chuckles.

I knock on the door of, well, my house, after awhile Prim opens it "Katniss!"She yells "Hi, Peeta"She greets him with a smile "Hi,Prim".

"Katniss, I don't see you much now."She says sad"You always wake up early and get out of the house before we wake up and then you come in the night when we're already sleeping. what's going on?"She asks concerned.

"Peeta and I need to talk to you and mom"I say.

Prim nods and opens the door for us to go in.

We go to the kitchen, where my mom is doing lunch.

"Katniss!Where have you been?"She asks.

"I've been busy."Truly, I have been in the bakery watching Peeta bake and talking to the customers.I don't want to face Gale.

"Hi Peeta, how are you?"She asks Peeta.

"I'm fine, thank you for asking, . "

"Mom, we need to tell you something, can you sit please?"Mom looks confused but does as I told.

"Mom, Prim, I'm pregnant."

"And I'm the father."

"Really?"Prim asks, I nod "I'm going to be an aunt!"She hugs me and then puts her face right in front of my belly "Hi baby!I'm your aunt, I don't know you yet, but I already love you."I smile at the side of my little sister talking to my baby.

My mother is in silence.

"Mom? Say something."She doesn't say anything "Please".

"How could you do that? You said you didn't want to have chidren. How could you two be so irresponsible?"

"I guess it just happened."I say.

"And you're going back into the arena"she murmurs"I'm going to help you on what I can."

"Thank you mom"I say truly grateful.

**End of flashback**

I'm ready and Peeta and Haymitch come to our are escort by peacekeepers to the center and get in front of The Justice Building.I'm trying to go to the stage but I'm having problems climbing the helps me, of course because I refuse the peacekeepers help.

The reaping is starting and I see in the crowd one person I've been avoiding for the last 3 months.

Gale. He doesn't know I'm pregnant.

Then I see his eyes going to my swollen belly and I look away, not wanting to see his face.

When I look back, Gale is staring at Peeta with an anger look on his face and clenching his fists.

Effie is already in the stage making the introduction."Welcome, welcome to the 75th annual Hunger Games and third Quarter Quell! As usual ladies."Effie's voice cracked a little "Katniss Everdeen" I put myself at Effie's left and start to feel tired so I sit on the chair that they put for me."Now for the boys."Effie continues

"Haymitch Abernathy"I really don't know what I'm feeling because it's a mist of emotions.I'm relief that is not Peeta, that means my baby will be safe with his father, then Peeta made the worst thing he could do.

"I volunteer as a tribute."


	4. Chapter 4

**A.N.I'm sorry for taking so long to update, I just finished this year school and couldn't talk to my friend, who is writting this fanfic with me. Thankyou for the reviews. Here's the chapter (as always in Katniss POV).**

**Chapter 4**

We've been in the Capitol for a week and I have been training, in the training center- well I can't train much since my belly is fucking huge. My moods are up and down lately, one second I'm screaming at Peeta because he knock me up and the next one I'm crying apologizing and begging him to have sex with me- of course he doesn't, we don't do anything besides kissing.

I still don't know what I feel about Peeta.I love to have his arms around me when I have nightmares.I love the way his lips feel in mine, and I know I would give my life for him. Is that love? If it's not,what is it?I'm so confused and the pregnancy doesn't help.

* * *

Today is the day of the interview with Caeser. This year it's different Peeta is gonna be interviewed first.

After being prepared by my team, Cinna opens the door, bringing a dress.

"Hello, girl on fire" he says.

Cinna already knows about the pregnancy-who wouldn't?I have a huge belly.

"So, how is our little mockingjay?"He has been calling my baby little mockingjay since we don't know the gender, I kinda like it.

"He or she is good, been kicking like crazy lately"I say annoyed.

He chuckles "I guess she's happy, let's get you dressed now."

* * *

Peeta walks to the stage to meet Caeser. The interview went well last year and they had fun,the audience loved them. I am nervous as hell. Terrified.

I'm suprised Peeta still hasn't talked about the baby. Probably they're saving it for the big finale, I mean, my pregnancy is the thing most talked since I show it to all of Panem in the reaping.

A hand on my shoulder makes me jump, interrupting my thoughts and I tense.

"Calm down sweetheart, I didn't meant to scary you"too late Haymitch"Are you ok?"

"Yeah I'm fine" It's a lie and Haymitch knows it but doesn't say anything.

"Ok sweetheart, go to the stage and do your thing. Good luck".

I hear Caeser calling my name and I step on the stage the people are applauding, whistling and pointing to my belly.

I was so distracted with them that I don't feel Peeta putting his arm around my waist and kissing my cheek.

"Oh, man" says Caeser with a hand in his eyes "I'm already crying" and everybody laughs a little, I, as always fake smile."So, Katniss" Caeser begins "How's going your pregnancy?When I found at the reaping day you were pregnant, I was shocked. I think all Panem was shocked too. I also became very happy. We all were, right folks?"He laughs with the crowd and I force a laugh.

"Then I'm grateful you didn't saw my face when I figure it out too."And the audience laughs again and starts asking details but Caeser shuts them and continues the interview.

"Peeta, how was Katniss's mother reaction when she found out?Cause I remember her saying that her daughter was too young to date." Peeta chuckles.

"She was mad at the beginning but I think she knows I would never leave Katniss."Peeta says and we lock eyes.I find myself lost in his intense blue eyes as Caeser is finishing with us.

"We all wish a very good luck for you two and for the baby"He looks at my belly "or the babies I presume".

* * *

I lay in my bed with Peeta hopping nobody comes to take him to his room. He is sitting looking at nothing.

"What are you thinking?"

"Uh?"He says "About you and the baby".

"Or babies"I say joking and giggle. Our noses are very close to each other, almost touching. I could feel his breath and our mouths collide. I can feel a spark between us and then the hunger starts, the hunger that I can't control. Our tongues make a dance and I let him win as his tongue explores my mouth.

"Stay with me,Peeta"I say reaching for air.

"Always."


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

I just saw Cinna being beaten by peacekeepers.I can't breath, I'm sobbing and plataform begins to rise and I know that I need to stop crying because that's what they want.I can't let them win.I recompose myself as much as possible and put an emotionless face.

At first I don't see anything just white eyes star to adjust the light.I see water, lots of water, I look around and I'm surrounded by water.

In my head I try to organize my ideas:

go to the cornucopia;

find a bow and arrows;

look for Peeta.

I get to the cornucopia and grab my bow and arrow and when I turn around to start looking for Peeta,I am met with a pair of green eyes.

"Hello, Girl on Fire Right thing we're allies."Finnick says raising his I see it, Haymitch's bracelet and I get it.

"Right"I say "I need to find Peeta".

"I'll find him and bring him to can't make efforts due to your condiction"He says pointing to my belly "We don't want to hurt little mockingjay do we?"

Now I'm angry "You know? I'm pregnant, not invalid."

He chuckles "Yeah, can't even walk here and choose the weapons you like, I come back here quickly with Peeta."

I find Enobaria running to the cornucopia and shoot na arrow at her but she is faster and dives into the water.I grab a couple of knives.

I hear Finnick scream "Katniss!Mags found him!".

I run as fast as I can behind I get there I see that Peeta is still in his plataform and doesn't know what to do. I remember he doesn't know how to swim,so I start to take the weapons off of me, But I'm stopped by Finnick. "Stop.I'll get him"I give him a glare, but let him do it.

When Peeta gets to me,I hug him and he says. "I guess we have allies."resting his hand on my stomach.I just smile and give him a peck on the lips.

"We have to get going 's not safe staying here for much longer."Finnick all nod and start to walk into the jungle after a few hours of walking, I stop and say "I…can't…walk…anymore.I…need…water."

"She's right, we need to stop and find water, it's getting hotter out here we must keep ourselves hydrated" says Finnick.

"I could climb a tree."I say.

"No, you're not going to do 's not safe for you and the baby."Peeta says.

"It's the only way or we all die"I say.

"Okay,be careful" he says.

"I will"

I start to climb the tree carefully,when I get to the top I see that the bloodbath is over.I look around but don't see any sight of water, disapointed I descend the tree.

"Nothing"I say.

"What are we going to do?"Finnick as he finish his sentece a parachute appears in front of us.I walk towards it, open it and inside is a metal object.

"What is it?"Finnick asks.

I don't answer then I remember what it is it's a spile my dad showed me once when I was little.

"It's a spile!"I shout.

"A spile?"Finnick asks.

"Yes, give me a rock"He gives me the rock "We carve the spile into the tree and the water comes out through this hole."I do this and first doesn't come out any water rotating and adjusting the spile, we got a constante wire of water.

After we all drink the water, Finnick says we are still too close of the cornucopia and we need to walk some more we start walk further into the jungle, with Peeta in the front, Finnick and Mags in the middle and me in the back when I look at Peeta I see the same shimmering I saw at the training center in the front of him.

"Peeta,no!"I shout but it's too late, Peeta hits the force field and he's thrown back we all fall but I stand up as fast as I can and run to Peeta who is on the floor without moving.

"Peeta?"I call with tears starting to fall from my eyes, he is with his eyes closed, dead still.

I put my ear on his chest to hear his heartbeat but instead I find silence.

"Peeta!Peeta please wake up!"I scream, sob and slap him hard in the face, but in vain his heart stopped.

Finnick pushes me back against a tree from where I sit I take the arrow and put it into place.I am about to release it when I am held by the sight of Finnick kissing Peeta It's so weird even for Finnick No,he is not kissing he has his hand covering Peeta's nose but openning his mouth, he is blowing air to his lungs Finnick rips the top of Peeta's jumpsuit and starts to make strain on his heart.

I remember my mom doing something similar, but not often.

He continues to do that for a long time The minutes pass,agonizingly.

When my hopes start to fade,Peeta coughs lightly and Finnick moves away.

I leave my weapons on the floor and go to him. "Peeta?"I call,I move a few strands of blond hair from his forehead and kiss him on the lips.

He blinks and looks me in the eyes. "Careful, there's a force field up there"I laugh but feel tears streaming down my face.

Peeta sees the tears and puts his hands on my face. "Hey,don't cry It's okay.I'm okay."

"You were dead!You're heart stopped!"I say,I cover my mouth with my hand because I start making some horrible suffocating noises while sobbing.

"Well, it looks like it's working now, I'm alright,Katniss."

I nod with my head but I can't stop sobbing "Katniss?"Now Peeta is worried about me He's the one who died and he is worried about me.

"Don't worry It's just her hormones Because of the baby."Says Finnick.

I ignore him and ask Peeta "Do you wanna stand up?"He nods.

I help him stand up and hug him tightly, missing the feeling of his embrace.

As I hug Peeta I hear a 'pop' and feel a gush of fluid run down my legs, I separate from him and look down My pants are soaked with water.I look at Peeta with my eyes wide and say.

"My water just broke."


	6. Chapter 6

**A.N. So, so, so sorry for the wait. I had a writers block and my friend is grounded (as usual).  
**

**With no more waits, here's the chapter.**

**Chapter 6**

"AAAHH"I scream in pain.

"OH MY GOSH, OH MY GOSH, WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A BABY, FUCK, IN THE ARENA, OH MY GOSH, FUCK, FUCK…"

"Peeta!Could you stop for a minute?I'm in pain here"I shout.

I think that he finally got it because he comes to my side "Um…I'm sorry, baby . I just can't believe that we're going to a have a baby in the arena . It's still too early."

"You don't think I know it's too early?"I say angrily.

"No,it's not that. Here, take my hand, honey. "He says I take his hand but say.

"Stop giving me nicknames, my name is KATNISS. KAT-NISS. K-A-T-N-I-S-S. AAAHH…!"I have another contraction and squeeze Peeta's hand.

"It's okay, Katniss. You're doing great. Keep breathing ."

Finnick who has been quiet all this time comes to me "Katniss, we need to far long are you. Mags is going down there. Don't worry, she did labors in district 4."

I nod and say "Okay, but I need something to cover me up, I don't want all of Panem and my family looking at my vagina."

He chuckles "I'm going to find something"A few minutes later he comes "Here, it was the best I could find."He puts it above my legs.

Mags comes and kneels down at my feet. She takes off my pants and my under pants. I have another contraction. She says something but I don't understand.

"Mags said for you to open your legs, Katniss"Finnick says. I nod and open my legs.

Mags just stares at it and that makes me feel uncomfortable. Then she raises her head at me and her hads on the air meaning I'm ten centimeters of dilation.

"Katniss, at the next contraction you need to push"Finnick says.

Peeta hasn't said anything and when I look at him, his face is pale like he has seen a ghost.

"Why are you with that face?Is it you, who is pain?Is it you that have to push a human inside…AAAHH!"I have another contraction.

"Push, Katniss, push!"Finnick says and I push.

"AAAHH!YOU…WILL…NEVER…GET…LAID…AGAIN" I say while pushing " This is all your fault. Yours and your dick's fault!"I say.

"Well, it takes two to dance tango"Peeta says. I am ready to replie when Finnick says

"Katniss your doing great. I'm seeing the head. "

"Really?"Peeta asks,then he goes to Finnick and tilts his to look between my legs "Ooh, Katniss it's beautiful. It has dark hair. Just like you"

"It really is, Katniss"Finnick says.

"Finnick!Peeta!Stop looking at my vagina!"I think they were hypnotized .They stop.

I give two more pushes and then I hear a cry. I see Peeta holding a little baby and I smile.

"It's a girl"He says as he puts her in my lap "Beautiful like her mother."

I look down at my girl . She has dark brown hair like me, but just when she opens her eyes for the first time tears come to mine as I see her's. Baby blue just like her father. She's the perfect blend of me and Peeta.

"She has your eyes. She's perfect, Peeta"I say and give him a kiss.

Then I feel the same pain I felt minutes ago and cry.

Peeta takes the baby and asks "Honey, what's wrong?"

"I don't know, I just know it hurts really bad."Another wave of pain comes "Mags?What's wrong?"I ask. Mags says something but as usual I don't understand, so Finnick responds.

"Katniss, Mags thinks you have twins and you have to push"Finnick says.

"I don't get it. What do you mean by twins?Do you mean two babies?I have to push one more baby out of me?"I ask and start to hyperventilate.

"Katniss, you need breathe and when you have the contraction push, okay?"Finnick ask and I nod.I have another contraction and I do as I was told and push.

After a few more pushes, the second baby comes out. I see Finnick holding the baby and saying "It's a boy". I smile and close my eyes.

I woke up with a headache and a big will to puke though that i haven't eat anything in probably two hours.

I look down and find my baby boy beside me sleeping, He's so perfect, blond hair and an angel face. I reach for his twin and found her at Finnick's lap sleeping too. I realize we're still in the arena and I'm afraid for them. I don't know what president Snow is planning but i promise i will never ever let him hurt my childrens.

I look at peeta and he looks at me."Ohh, Katniss. You scare me to death I thought that I was going to lose you. They need their mother."He says motioning for the twins.

"I'm never going to leave you."I say and kiss him.

Peeta looks at me nervously "Katniss, Mags said that you have to breastfeed."I look at him and I see that his face is so red like tomato.

I ignore Peeta and take the boy first. I take the top of the jumpsuit, put him in front of my breast and he starts sucking my nipple"Peeta I think it's time to name them" I say but he ignores me because is to busy staring at my breast. "Can you please stop staring?It's like you haven't see it." I yelled at him blushing.

"I have to say that I'm a little jealous of them"Peeta says and that makes me blush even harder

When he finally looks at me, I say "Peeta we have to name the twins. They have to have a name"

"Oh, sorry, yeah. I was thinking Daisy for her, keeping the flower name tradition from your family."

"I love it"Then I take Daisy and give the boy to Peeta "Hello, Daisy. I'm your mommy. For the boy I think we should name after bread just like you"

"Okay, there's one name that I really like it. Graham. It means grain"Peeta says.

"I love it."I say then look at both of my babies and say "Welcome to the world Graham and Daisy Mellark. I'll do anything to keep you save"I look down at Daisy and her beautiful blue eyes look at me like she understands me

That's the moment that I know that I love both my babies with all my heart. I wasn't sure if would love them because I never wanted children.

A large parachute lands at my feet. I look at Peeta and he gives me Graham and goes to open it. Inside is two pairs of baby ouffits two little hats, two babygrows and two socks. One of the ouffits is blue and says 'I love mommy', the other is pink and says 'I love daddy'. The parachute also has diapers and a couple of little blankets.

I wonder how Haymitch got all of this, it must has needed a lot of sponsors. I thank Haymitch.

"It's funny, how we are the arena with two babies and one of us is going to die if not the two us but they still buy us baby clothes with phrases saying I love you mommy and I love you daddy."I say.

**Just to let you know the next chapter will be in Gale' POV**


	7. Chapter 7

**This chapter is a little short and is in Gale POV. Thank you for the reviews and I hope you like it.  
**

**And Review!**

**Chapter 7**

**Gale' POV**

I'm so angry.

I am in my house watching the games with my family and I'm so angry. That's what you feel when you're watching the girl you've been in love with giving birth in the arena when she clearly said she was never going to have children.

After the Victory Tour, Katniss avoid me and I thought it was about the kiss I gave her before she went away, but I was wrong, it was worse than that, she was pregnant with the Mellark boy. If I had known sooner, I sure as hell would beat the crap out of him. That baby should be mine not that Mellark.

Though Katniss was ignoring me, the anouncement of the Quarter Quell left me devasted. I didn't want her to go through all the terror and fear of people trying to kill you at any second. I wish Icould volunteer for her, take her awayy to a place safe where she wouldn't get hurt, but I can't all Ican do is sit on the couch and watch.

God, how much I hate the Capitol. They make us beg for something to eat, take children from their parents and force them to kill each other just to get back home. People die of hunger everyday, while in the Capitol they have all the food they want. At the end of the day they go to bed with their stomach full just for in the morning wake up and entertain themselves seeing children being slaughtered.

On the day of the reaping, me and my family went to the front of Justice Building to watch the reaping as everyone else. But there would be no point because we already know who are the tributes, Katniss is the only female winner so she's going in again and I think it's pathetic to even have a reaping ball for the females when there's only one paper with one name to read.

How could Catnip let him touch her like that. She was so pure and shy. I love her for that.

The baby is a girl. But Catnip is still with pains and they say it's twins so she has to push more to get that baby out off her. Mellark is holding her hand. _That should be me holding her hand. That should be my baby. _

But when the second baby's born, it's a boy, I see that she is really truly happy. She has the brightest smile that I ever seen in my life. I smile back at her even if she doesn't see me.

Now I know that she is the mockingjay.

She's our salvation.

She's our hope.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

_I open my eyes._

_I'm standing in the middle of the jungle in the arena. I look to my right side and find Peeta but don't see the twins. I look around searching for them, but I see nothing._

_When I look back at Peeta I see his expression. His eyes are blank and dark, like there's no soul, just a body. He's stiff with his jaw clenched. He looks ahead but at nothing especific._

_My heart shatters. "Peeta. Peeta, where are the twins? Peeta, tell me. Where are Daisy and Graham? Peeta, please, look at me. Where are they?" I'm sobbing and screaming now._

_I fall to my knees and continue to call his name but he doesn't move a muscle._

_Then I hear footsteps and look up. His eyes are the same as they were. But no. They're colder and show no mercy, just like a snake. A deadly snake._

_Snow._

_In his arms are two blankets, one blue and the other one pink. I have no doubt that's my children. In the arms of the man who made me fear of having them so much._

"_Hello, Ms. Everdeen." He says._

"_It's Mellark." I say._

"_I do have to admit that you have two lovely children."_

"_They're perfect"_

"_Indeed, they are"_

"_And they're mine" I say between teeth._

"_That's where you're wrong, Ms. Everdeen"_

"_Mellark"_

"_This two beautiful babies are mine just as your husband and you and all of Panem is. I can do whatever I want you to."_

_He comes closer to me but suddenly turns to Peeta, Snow takes out a knive and slits Peeta's throat._

_Blood gushing everywhere. I try to move but I can´t. It's like I'm stuck in na invisible box where there is no oxygen, no space and all I can do is scream._

_He looks at me with an evil smile and then at the babies._

"_Say bye-bye to mommy" He says. With the same knive he killed Peeta, he stabs the twins right in the heart._

I wake up panting, shaking and drowned in sweat. I look to the side and see Peeta sleeping with his arms across me and the twins between us.

I know I won't be able to go back to sleep, so I take Peeta's arm around me, carefully not wake him and kiss the twins.

I find Finnick sitting on the ground looking at the moon. "You should go to sleep, I can't so. I can watch." I say

He turns around "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I need time to think."

He stands up "Okay."

I sit and put my back against a tree. I think about all the things that happened since last year.

My sweet little sister was reaped, but I volunteered for her. I couldn't let her into the games, she couldn't hurt a fly. Then the boy who saved mine and my family's life from starvation is reaped. I had to kill him. But I didn't. We both won.

We didn't win we survived, like Haymitch said to me. _There are no winners, only survivers_. We came back home. But broken, not the same people that we were before the games. Full of nightmares from the games. That's why after coming back from the Capitol I couldn´t sleep, too many nightmares. I would wake up panting and drowned in my own sweat. During the day I looked like a walking zombie, roaming through the town. One night I couldn't take it, so I went to see if Peeta was awake. My mother and Prim were already asleep. The door was unlocked, I invited myself in. I climbed the stairs and went to Peeta's room. He was awake with his back onto the headboard of the bed. When he sees me he opens his arms and I run straight into them.

We continue that routine. I sneak out from my house to his and we sleep together, clinging each other, trying to keep the nightmares away.

In the Victory Tour the same happens, but one night after the speech in District 11 and seeing that man being killed, we both needed to be comforted. Several kisses and one thing led to another, and now we have two beautiful babies.

But, of course there is a bad side, life ain't always perfect. Peeta and I were reaped again.

I don't know what to do. We're in the arena, Finnick just revive Peeta and I don't understand why, we're in the games, we're supposed to kill each other, not resurrect.

I barely can open my eyes. Sleep is overtaking me. But when I do open my eyes, I see fog going towards us. I stand up and when I touch it, I feel an immensely strong pain in my hand, I look at it and I see blisters in all the places the fog touched my hand.

"Wake up! Wake up!" I shout "The fog is poisoning!" They wake up immediately. Peeta takes Daisy and I take Graham. Finnick takes Mags in his back. We start to run as fast as we can.

Peeta and I try to protect the twins from the fog.

"Ahh"Peeta and I scream. The fog thouched us on our backs, but the twins didn't get hurt. That makes us run faster.

When we are far enough, we turn around and see Finnick and Mags falling on the ground. Finnick screaming in pain.

"Mags…Mags, I can't. Anymore. It hurts." Finnick says. Mags looks at him, says something that I don't hear and kisses him right in the mouth. Then turns around and walks into the fog. We see her collapse on the ground and shudders almost like a dance. Her canon goes off and she's dead.

"No! No! Mags! No! Please! No! Mags! Mags!"

"Finnick, no. She's dead. We need to go." He gets up and starts to run.

When we can't run any longer, I start to think _This is it, we're all gonna die, _but something weird happens, the fog starts to get sucked up and then it's gone.

I breathe of relief.

It's going to be hard to protect Peeta and the twins.

But I'll try.


	9. Chapter 9

**A.N. I'm sorry for the wait. This chapter is bigger than the others but it has a crappy ending. I just wanted to update. In this chapter there's a little of swearing but it's not much. I hope you like it. Review!  
**

**Chapter 9**

We're walking over an hour, my feets hurt and the twins are crying irritaded. Peeta and Finnick attempt to calm them while I try to hunt but their screams chase the squirrels or whatever the producers invented. Maybe they're just hungry, even though they just ate one hour ago, so I take them from Peeta and Finnick and move away to have some privacy. After breastfeeding Daisy and Graham, I feel like someone or something is watching me. A moviment in a bush calls my attention.

"Peeta" I murmured. "I think the bush just moved" He comes and picks Daisy from me. "There's nothing here Kat,it's probably just a little wind." He replies, but I know I saw something, I'm not crazy.

"Peeta, I swear I saw somethin-"

"Guys, could you come here? I think I found something." Finnick cuts me off. "Walk over here slowly and don't look up. Look at the ground." We do what he told us.

"Finnick what is it?" Peeta asks without lifting his head.

"You can raise your head. Slowly." What we see is…I don't even know. It's some animal looking right into my eyes. I think I've seen this animal before, in my school when the teacher was talking about the human evolution. It's called a monkey. But this one is a little different, it has huge fangs and claws and it's enormous.

I look at Peeta and he's exactly like I think I am. His eyes are wide and his mouth is slightly open. He glances at the twins, Daisy in his arms looking at him with her big blue eyes and Graham in my arms sleeping peacefully. We look back at the monkey too fast. A gutural piercing scream fills the hair. The rest of the monkeys emerge from the trees full of rage.

"Katniss. Katniss! Here, take her!" He says urgently, giving Daisy to me. He has to shout over the srieking noise the monkeys are doing. " Run! Go to the beach! Go, Katniss!" He turns me around in the direction of the beach.

"No! No! I'm not gonna leave you! I'm not gonna do that!" I say turning around.

"Please, Katniss! Please, go! Don't let them get hurt!" He pleads. For them. For the twins. For our children. I nod. "I'll come back to you. I always do, Katniss." I nod again.

He kisses me and says. "I love you and our children." I don't even think before I reply. "I love you too." His eyes widen. I turn around and run for the beach, the noise of Peeta and Finnick wrestling with the horrific monkeys fading away. I arrive to the beach safe and sound, well that's an understatement. I sit near the water, breathing heavily.

Did I just said I love Peeta? Did I do it because of the cameras? I don't think so. I was just looking at his beautiful blue eyes, that my daughter inherited from, full of love and desire for me. That moment right there I loved him. And I know I love him, present tense.

That's what I didn't wanted, to get attached. I supose I cared about him long before I knew. I didn't want my feelings to get in the way. But now it's too late, what if something happens to him? What if he dies, again? I can't take it, I'd be just like my mother. Motionless, unresponsive.

I look at my children. Our children. They are the perfect mix of both of us. Daisy with Peeta's nose and eyes but my hair. Graham with my nose and eyes but Peeta's blond curls. They're so tiny, just two days old. I never thought I could love someone this much, unless Prim, but I do.

The twins are still crying because they were startled by the sounds that the monkeys were doing. So, I sing, trying to calm them, the only song I remember right now. The song that I sang to Prim the morning of reaping of the first games, the song that I sang to Rue when she was on her deathbed.

_Deep in the meadow, under the willow_

_A bed of grass, a soft green pillow_

_Lay down your head, and close your sleepy eyes_

_And when you awake, the sun will rise._

_Here it's safe, here it's warm_

_Here the daisies guard you from harm_

_Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true_

_Here is the place where I love you._

_Deep in the meadow, hidden far away_

_A cloak of leaves, A moonbeam ray,_

_Forget your woes and let your troubles lay_

_And when again it's morning, they'll wash away._

_Here it's safe, here it's warm_

_Here the daisies guard you from every harm_

_Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true_

_Here is the place where I love you._

I finish the song and the twins are both asleep. I kiss them on forehead. I hear footsteps, stand up and hide behind a big rock. Three people emerge from the jungle, they're covered with something red.

"Johanna?! Johanna!"

"Finnick?! Finnick!" Finnick emerges from the jungle, runs for Johanna and hugs her. Behind him is Peeta full of blood with a person on his arms. I run to him.

"Peeta, what happened? Is this your blood? Oh my god, please answer me. Are you going to die?" I start to cry, like really crying, sobbing. Peeta touches my shoulder.

"Katniss, calm down. It's okay. I'm okay. It's not my blood, it's hers." He says motioning to the woman in his arms, who is whimpering quietly. "She's dying." His eyes are sad and guilty. "She's dying because of me."

I look at the woman, I remember her from one of the tapes, she became a morphling addicted after winning.

Haymitch became a drunk, others became drug addicts, I have nightmares that will never end. But Peeta is the best of us, even though he suferred as much, he's still sweet and kind. I put my hand on his cheek. "Oh, Peeta. That's not true. You could never do that. Let's just go lay her on the sand." He nods and puts her on the ground.

"What do we do now?" He asks.

"Talk to her." I say, his kind words were always there for me and always made me feel after having a nightmare. He nods again and starts to speak sweet things with the most smoothing voice.

After a few minutes a canon goes off. She's dead. Peeta picks her up and puts her in the water floating. A hovercraft comes and grabs her while we see her body limp.

The twins already wake up, so I give Graham to Peeta and he kisses them on the forehead.

"She sacrificed herself and I didn't even know her name." Peeta says.

"What did she do?"I ask.

"Me and Finnick were killing the monkeys, they were a lot so I didn't see it. A monkey appeared in front of me, I really thought I was going to die, but all of the sudden, I didn't even knew she was there, she just jumped in front of me. The monkey bit her right in chest the rest you already know." He explains.

"Do you really think she sacrificed herself?"

"Looked like it."

"That doesn't make any sense." Because it doesn't, we're in the hunger games. We have to kill each other, Peeta is not an exception.

When we go to Finnick, we see Johanna talking really fast. "- It's when started to rain. I thought it was water, it turned out to be blood. Hot. Thick. Blood. It was choking us. We were stumbling around gagging on it. Blind. That's when Blight hit the force field. He wasn't much but he was from home. Then we run and ended up on the beach."

I look at the persons that came with Johanna. It's a man and woman. The woman is just saying 'Tick Tock' like a mantra. The man is washing this thing, like wire.

"Who are they?" I ask Johanna.

"Are you fucking serious? They are Volts and Nuts. If it wasn't for me, they'd be dead! I brought them for you!" She says angry. Finnick and Peeta have hold her down, because she's really agressive. I take a step back and tighten my grip on Daisy.

"For me? What does that mean?" I whisper

"You did want them as alllies." Peeta says.

After Johanna calms down she finally sees Daisy in my arms and her eyes widen. "You already had the kid. Well, that was quick wasn't it?" She then looks at Peeta and sees Graham with him. "And they're two?" She asks shocked.

"Yes" I say bitter.

"They're twins. One boy, Graham and one girl, Daisy."Peeta adds.

"Two cute babies with cute names. Isn't perfect? You two fall in love, get marry secretly, get pregnant even though you're mother said that you're too young to date. Finally, you have not one but two babies. The perfect fairy tale." She says screaming and laughing.

"You think this is perfect? We are in the fucking hunger games, for God's sake! I have two newborn babies that I have to take care, feed and protect and I'm not even talking about Peeta! One of us is going to have to die and this chilldren are going to grow up without a father or a mother figure for the rest of their lifes. Or both of us could die and they became orphans, who the hell knows where they'd end up? Or with who?"I say.

She just looks at me for a while. "Woah, did I hear it well? I think so. Katniss Everdeen! The girl on fire just swore and told how hard her life is. We all have a hard life, just because you have doesn't mean, we don't." I can't handle this.

"Go fuck yourself." I say as I turn around and go sit away from them.

Daisy is crying soo much and so loud because of the screaming between me and Johanna. "Shh, it's okay. Shh. It's okay, baby. I'm so sorry for yelling. Shh, come on stop crying, baby." I say rocking her slowly.

She stops crying and Peeta shows up with Graham.

Even after all that yelling Graham isn't crying like his sister. He is calmer than her and he's just likes watching everything that's happening around us, he's so much like Peeta.

"Here, do you want to go to daddy?" I say to Daisy. She gives little bit of a smile at the sound of the name daddy and I smile too. I give her to Peeta.

He smiles at her. "Hello, princess. It hasn't been a very good day for you, has it?" I smile and stand up, but Peeta grabs my wrist.

"Are you okay? Where are you going?" He asks concerned.

"I'm okay, Peeta. I'm just going to wash the blood out of Wiress." I say smiling a little. He nods but doesn't let me go, in fact his grip tightens and he pulls me down to his lips. His lips brush lightly against mine and he breaks away the kiss. He puts a strand of hair behind my ear and comes close it. I feel his hot breath when he whispers slowly and clear. "I love you."

I shiver a little because in that three words I can feel all the love he has for me. So when I turn to look at him in the eyes, I try to put all the love I have for him in those three words and say. "I love you." I kiss him hard and quick.

* * *

"Tick, tock, tick, tock…" Wiress says.

"What happened to her? Why is she just saying 'tick tock' non stop?" I asks Beetee, who is washing his wire.

"She's in shock. Dehydration isn't helping. Do you have some fresh water?" He questions.

"We can get some." I say.

He nods. I go to Wiress take her arm and bring her to the water.

"Come on, let's get you cleaned up."

I start by cleaning her hair.

"Tick tock."

"Tick tock." I reply.

"Tick tock."

Why is she saying tick tock? It has to be something."Tick. Tock. It's a clock. Oh my god, it's a clock! You're a genius, Wiress! It's a clock! You're a genius!" I say, holding her face with my hands.

"So, the arena is set up like a clock?" Peeta asks. I nod. "And every hour as different threat?"I nod again.

"Wiress, you're a genius." Finnick says.

* * *

We are in the cornucopia and Wiress is sitting near the water singing a song about a clock. "Okay, let's see." Peeta grabs a big leaf and starts to make draws the arena in a clock. "What happened between 12 and 1?"

"Uh, there was lightening, I think."

He writes lightening in the 12-1 section. "What's next?"

"There was the blood rain. I think it was first than the poisoning fog but after the lightening." Johanna says.

Peeta writes the other threats in their respective sections.

Wiress stops singing and gasps. Gloss had slit her throat. Johanna raises her axe, aims at Gloss's heart and throws it. Gloss's canon goes off.


	10. Chapter 10

**A.N. Sorry for the wait again. I'll try to update as fast as I can. I started school a few weeks ago, so it's been a lot of things at once. Review and let me know what you think. :)  
**

**Chapter 10**

After running from the cornucopia, I get to the beach and turn around. Johanna, Beetee, Finnick and Peeta are fighting the careers. Finnick killed Gloss right after he killed Wiress.

One tear starts to slide down my cheek, thinking of Wiress, but I clean it. _Now is not the time to cry, _I think.

The cornucopia begins spining so fast that all of them drop to the floor. The girl from District 1, Cashmere falls to the water looking more like a doll than a real person. Her canon goes off.

I stop breathing. Peeta has fallen. Just after, the cornucopia stops spining. I go to where Peeta fell. Nothing happens for a few seconds, until Peeta comes to the water surface gasping for air.

"Peeta!" I breathe. "Are you okay?"

He looks up at me with a little smile and nods, still unable to speak. Johanna and Finnick aproach us.

"Are you alright?" Finnick asks. "I'm fine." Peeta replies.

"Let's just get out of this bloody island." Johanna says.

We walk away from the cornucopia and go to the beach.

* * *

"I don't know what you and Haymitch talked about, but he also made me promises." Peeta says.

"I know, but you have to live. You deserve to, I don't. I know you will take care of them." I say looking at my babies. "Your the best father they could ever had."

Peeta shakes his head. " They don't need a father, they need a mother. You don't get it, do you? If you die and I live I'd have nothing." I open my mouth to speak but he points a finger in the air. "Sure, I'd have the twins. But I wouldn't be giving them good life, would I? I would feed them, cloth them but I wouldn't be loving them. I would always be thinking of their mother, the woman that I've been in love with since I was five and how couldn't save her. I'm going to die and you're going to go home. You're so strong, Katniss. You can do this" He touches my cheek.

"I can't do this alone." I blurt. "I need you."

"No, you don't."

I climb his lap and put my hands around his neck, hugging him.

"I do. I need you." I whisper in his ear and feel him shiver. And before he goes to talk. I kiss him. First he doesn't move, obviously shocked, but he recorvers and kisses me back. Our lips mold into each other. I feel his tongue poking at my bottom lip, begging for entrance so I open my mouth.

So much love, desire and passion are exchanged between us in this kiss.

"Alright, love birds! Knock it off!" Johanna yells.

We both break away from the kiss, embarassed with our cheeks red.

"Here." Peeta says. He takes the necklace that Effie gave him and I realize that it's not a necklace but a locket with three pictures: one of Prim, one of my mother and one of Gale (suprisingly happy).

He puts it on my hand. "Think about it." Then stands up.

* * *

"I have a plan." Beetee says lowly. Everyone stoops eating the bread from District 4 that the sponsors bought us.

Daisy and Graham are both in my arms. I fed them half na hour ago. They're sleeping soundly now. Peeta stands, takes Daisy and sits closer to Beetee. I do the same and sit beside him. Finnick and Johanna get closer too. No one says anything, waiting for Beetee to speak.

"I have a plan." He repeats. "Where do you think the careers are right now?"

"Probably in the jungle, near the beach." I say.

"And why are they not in the beach, since it's the safest place?" He questions.

"Because we're here. We claim it." Johanna replies.

"Exactly. So, what I sugest is that we attach this wire" Beetee motions to the wire in his hands "to that tree" andd points at lightining tree " and bring it to the beach, so that the lightining that strikes at 1 generates an electric current. Anyone in the water or in the damp water will be electrocuted."

"Won't the wire burn up?" I question.

"No. I assure-"

Beetee is cut off by an excruciating scream. I look up because I know that voice. My sister. PRIM. She's in danger. And she's calling for me to help her. I put Graham on the sand and stand up as fast as I can. I run and run, screaming her name, never stoping. Her agonizing screams filing my ears.

I stop. I'm hearing the screams right above me.

I look up.

A jabberjay. Anger invades every fiber of my body as I point an arrow to the bird. It falls to the floor with a loud _thud._ I look to my right and Finnick is looking at me. When I open my mouth to say that it was just a jabberjay, we hear another scream but this time it's not my sister, it's a woman.

"Finnick! Finnick! Please help me! Please!" The woman pleads.

Finnick wides his eyes and just starts running like maniac, screaming the woman's name –who I found is called Annie- and asking where is she.

I try to run behind him but as a woman who gave birth three days ago, I can't do much running.

"Finnick! No, it's not her! It's just a stupid jabberjay!"

He stops and I catch up to him. He suddenly turns to me. "Yeah? So, how do they make that sound, Katniss? Jabberjays imitate voices they heard."

I'm speechless because of the meaning of his words.

"Katniss!" Gale's voice shouts. I start to run away to the beach, Finnick beside me. More jabberjays start copy voices. I see Peeta and it looks like he's saying something but I can't hear him. I start to run faster and yell Peeta's name. I get Peeta but hit into an invisible wall.

I start to kick and punch the wall with all my strength, but it's useless. Turn around to the birds and try to kill as much as I can, but it seems like everytime I kill one, ten more appear. I give up and just I lower to my knees and put my hands on my ears, trying unsuccessful to stop the pleading screams from my loved ones. Finnick does the same and we stay like that until the end of the hour.


	11. Chapter 11

**A.N. This is the last chapter of catching fire, the next one will be on the mockingjay. Enjoy!**

**Chapter 11**

"Who's Annie?" I ask. Me and Johanna are sitting on the sand in the beach looking at the sunset. Peeta is with the twins near the water, talking to them like they could understand and splashing their tiny feet on the water. I think he's trying to spend as much time as he can with them. And it breaks my heart that he still thinks that he should be the one to die.

"Annie Cresta is the winner of the 70th hunger games. She's crazy, but who wouldn't be after what she saw in the games." Johanna answers.

I turn my head to look at her. "What happened?"

"She saw the boy that was reaped from her district being beheaded. After that she was never the same. She only won because the gamemakers flooded the arena and she was the only one who knew how to swim."

"Does Finnick love her?" I say after a while processing all the information that Johanna told me.

"He does. Don't know how or why. But he loves her more anything, more than any person could ever love another. They both had a hard life."

After the jabberjay hour passed Peeta told me to take my hands out of my ears and I carefully did. I looked at Finnick and he was in shock as well. Hours later we arrived and Finnick ran right away to the water. And he stayed there.

I watch when he dives into the water and just stays under. When I begin to think he's drowned, he reappears. "He loves the water. It reminds him of home and her." Johanna says seeing me watching Finnick. "Love's weird."

I nod. I thought that all the victors of the games were mean, vicious and thirsty for blood. Some might be, but some like Finnick, Annie or even Haymitch and Johanna didn't want this happen.

* * *

Beetee, Peeta and Finnick finish tying the wire to the tree. I have Daisy with me and Graham is with Johanna. "Okay…" Beetee says "We need to be fast. Johanna and Katniss, you two take the wire and go to the beach. You need to be fast and careful. Make sure the whole coil is in the water. Peeta will stay with the twins and we will help him. Understand?"

"What? No. I'm going to stay here with Peeta and you, Finnick can go with Johanna." I reply.

"No. Peeta will stay here and you will go with Johanna." Beetee says.

"It's his plan. We all agreed to it." Johanna says.

"Is there a problem here?" Finnick asks.

"Great question." Beetee says.

"No. There's no problem." I go to Peeta and give him Daisy while Johanna gives Graham to Finnick. "Be safe." I tell him "The three of you."

"We will. Come back to us. Okay?" Peeta says. His eyes are so sad. I know how scared he is to let me go alone.

"Okay." I give him on last kiss. "I'll see you at midnight."

"Alright let's go. I don't know about you but frying is not how I intend to die." Johanna says sarcastically. I chuckle a little, even in this situation Johanna still can be funny.

After walking for a few minutes the wire gets stuck. "Wait." I say to Johanna "There's something." I push it and it comes back. Somebody cut it.

Something hits my head hard and I black out. When I come to, I see Johanna cutting my arm with her knive. I scream loudly as the pain hits me. Johanna puts her hands on my throat and squeezes a little. "Stay down and shut up." She whispers and leaves me alone.

I put my hand on my wounded arm and make pressure to stop the bleeding. I try to move, but the pain is to much.

Johanna just tried to kill me. And left me to die. Was this her plan all along? Is Finnick also part of it? Was the plan for us to be allies with them so they could gain our trust and then divide us and kill us? Oh my god, Peeta is alone with the twins. Johanna left me here to die and went to Finnick to kill Peeta and my babies.

That's when the canon goes off.

My eyes widen. Oh no, they killed him.

I gather all my strength and stand up, groaning as pain ascends. Then I hear it. "KATNISS! KATNISS, where are you?" I'd know that voice anywhere.

"Peeta! Peeta, I'm here!" I respond.

Another canon goes off. I don't hear Peeta anymore.

I start to run as faster as I can to the lightning tree, screaming Peeta's name. I know it's danger and I shouldn't shout but I don't care.

When I get to the lightning tree, I see a Beetee on the ground shaking and next to Beetee are my babies crying. They're alone, Peeta isn't there. Where could he be?

I take Daisy and Graham in my arms trying to calm them down and go to Beetee.

"Beetee?" I touch his arm. He doesn't answer me. "Beetee, can you hear me? Are you okay? Where's Peeta? What's happening?" He just keeps shaking. The twins stopped crying.

I don't know what to do, then Haymitch's voice comes to my mind _Remenber who the real enemy is. _What does that mean? Who is the real enemy? The capitol.

I pick up the twins, put them far way from the tree. I come to the tree back and tie Beetee's wire to one of my arrows. I aim to the sky and let the arrow fly, not really knowing what I'm doing.

The arena explodes and I'm thrown back. Everything after that is a blur. I think I hear the twins loud screams from afar but I don't really know.

_I'm sorry, Peeta. About everything I did to you. Take care of twins if you're alive. You are such a great father. _

_I'm sorry._

And I close my eyes.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Am I dead? Why am I not dead? I should be dead.

That was my first thoughts when I woke up in the hovercraft after they took me from the arena.

I found Finnick, Haymitch and Plutarch Heavensbee talking and they told me that I'm the symbol of the revolution and that we were going to District 13, I asked where Peeta was and they looked at each other until Haymitch stepped in.

He didn't stare at my eyes when he said "We tried to save him but they got him first. He was captured by the Capitol. I'm sorry Katniss."

I couldn't think straight. I felt numb, empty. I felt like I'm was going crazy. I didn't know what to do. Just as Haymitch finished I jumped at him clawing my nails, making him feel the pain that I was feeling and that Peeta was probably feeling.

After I attacked Haymitch they sedated me. When I woke up again, I was already in a hospital bed in District 13 and I asked a nurse while she was looking through my files, where were my babies.

She looked at me. Her face showing sadness.

"I'm sorry but I can't tell you miss. You'd have to ask the doctor." I nodded

A few hours later, the doctor came.

"Miss Everdeen, I believe we were not introduced. My name is Doctor Aurelius." He said.

The man isn't much old, he must be in his thirties with dark Brown eyes and short brown hair.

"Where is my son and daughter?" I asked.

"Miss Everdeen, your son and daughter were really malnourished because when you were in the arena you didn't get all the nutrients that you needed so your milk wasn't enough."

"Luckily, your children are well now, we fed them with a milk with all the nutrients that yours was lacking of. They're stronger now." D. Aurelius answered.

"Can I see them now?"

"You can. I'm going to tell a nurse to get them." Then he left.

The happiness of seeing my babies was so huge that I couldn't contain the tears from slipping.

I looked at the nurse of brought the twins and asked. "How long was out?" I touch the little tuff of hair of Daisy.

"One week."

* * *

I miss outside. I miss the heat of the summer touching my skin. I even miss the cold days. But most of all I miss District 12. Down in District 13 the air is stale and everything is grey- even the food.

I was in the hospital for one month. I got out one week ago and now I live in a compartment alone with the twins but they still don't fully trust me because the compartment is one of the closest to the hospital. That's also one of the reasons my mother and Prim live right beside me as they now work in the hospital, my mother as a nurse and Prim helping here and there.

The compartment is small but bigger than others. It has tiny bathroom and one bedroom with a bed and two wooden cribs, one in each side of the bed and a dresser with the little I own and the twins clothes in it. The nurses gave me baby stuff for Graham and Daisy like clothes, baby bottles, diapers, pacifiers and a stroller.

They're so big now. Graham is looking everyday more like Peeta, blonde hair and my grey eyes, sometimes I just stare at him for a while because it looks like I'm staring back at Peeta not my son. And every time someone starts playing with him he always smiles widely. He can make a dark day brighter. Daisy on the contrary is more like me, she's quieter, more easy to care but I love them both equally.

I started a routine. I wake up early – because now the nightmares are worse and the twins don't let me sleep-, I feed the twins and put them on the stroller, I go to the dining hall for breakfast and sit in the table for the Hawthorne and Everdeen family then I completely ignore the schedule that's written in my arm – that's another thing that I hate about District 13, every day we have to put our arms on the wall and it marks a schedule that we have fulfill – and wander through the halls with the twins.

That's what I do after lunch. I like wandering through the halls because I don't like people staring at me – which happens a lot – so when Gale comes to me I'm not prepared. He's taller now, older and stronger. I haven't talked to him since before the games.

"Hey, Catnip." He says.

"Hi." I reply quietly and start pushing the stroller.

"How are you?" He asks walking beside me.

"How do you think I am? I'm awful. I have to take care of two newborn babies alone. And oh, yes I also have to be the mockingjay for the revolution even though I don't want it."

"You're so different now Catnip. You're not the girl I met six years ago. You're stronger but there's one thing that I don't understand. I thought you loved me." He says downcast

"Gale, I'm sorry but I love Peeta. You need to understand that. I had his babies. Didn't you see the games? What I said to him?" I say.

"I saw it, Catnip. But after you came from the first games, you said it was all for the cameras. I thought that we would be together and maybe later get married and have our own kids. That was supposed to be our future." He says frustrated.

"Even if I didn't go to the games, I'd never married anyone. Not even you. Because marriage leads to kids. And you know I'd never wanted to bring my child into this world."

Gale's cut off by the beep of his communicuff – which looks like a big watch. He looks at me.

"We're needed in the command." He says. Command is room where they have meetings and talk about the rebellion in the districts, it has all this high technology that I don't even dare to touch.

As we enter the command I notice that the room is full and that president Coin is also here. President Coin is the current leader of District 13, she looks like she has about fifty years old. She has grey eyes but not like the people from the seam, hers are pale like every bit of colour has been sucked from them. Her grey hair falls in an unbroken sheet to her shoulders, I find myself somewhat fascinated by how uniform it is.

President Coin clears her throat and all of us quiet down and look at her.

"As you may all know District 12 was bombed after Miss Everdeen exploded the arena." She starts.

That's another thing that happened as if it was possible, after I destroyed the arena, the Capitol sent bombs to District 12, all that's left is ruins and ashes. They found Gale and his family still alive and rescued them. The other people are probably dead. Or that's what I thought.

"It happens that as our soldiers were on the way to District 6, they saw a commotion coming from the woods outside of District 12. They landed the hovercraft and saw that about 800 people from the district. It's wasn't much but it was better than nothing." She adds.

"We are they now?" Someone from the back asks.

"They are on their way to District 13." Coin looks at her watch on her wrist and says. "In fact they'll be here in ten minutes."


	13. Chapter 13

**A.N. This chapter is one of the shortest chapter I ever did, but I just wanted to give you a new chapter. Please enjoy and review.**

**Chapter 13**

We get up to meet the people from twelve but we're stop by the voice of the one and only Caesar Flickerman.

"Good evening, panem. Today I have a very special guest. Please welcome, Mr. Peeta Mellark." The camera moves from Caesar to Peeta's face. I slowly make my way to the front of the screen put my hand on it, trying to feel his skin beneath my own.

"Hello Caesar. How are you?" Peeta looks strong and healthy, more than I expected. His skin looks flawless and glowing. His manner's composed. All those nights full of nightmares, seeing him tortured by peacekeepers and die again and again…

His image now doesn't reconcile with those awful nightmares.

"I'm fine. How about yourself?" Caesar asks.

"Okay, I guess." Peeta shrugs his shoulders.

"There's some things we need to clarify. This games were a little…different from the others. Can you explain us what happened in the end?"

There's a long pause where Peeta just stares at his lap. "Well, Caesar. You must know that being in the games is the worst place you could be, especially this last one. After being separated from Katniss, I knew that something was going to go wrong. I couldn't die or if they killed me the twins would be alone, because Katniss was with Johanna."

I looked at the twins in their stroller, they are quiet but their eyes are wide. They recognize Peeta's voice.

"Do you hear that? It's your daddy. He's alive." I say to them, tears streaming down my face. Everyone in the room is quiet as Peeta continues.

"But when I heard a canon and I thought she died, I completely lost it. I just remember pieces of what happened after that

"As bad as it makes you feel, you're going to have to do some killing, because in the arena, you only get one wish. And it's very costly."

"It costs your life," says Caesar.

"Oh, no. It costs a lot more than your life. To murder innocent people?" says Peeta. "It costs everything you are."

"Everything you are." Caesar repeats.

"And my wish that night was to save Katniss and keep my son and daughter alive, but things got out of control and…"

"And you realized you were too caught up in Beetee's plan" Caesar assumes. "What about Haymitch? Did he know anything? Did he tell you?"

"I don't know what Haymitch knew, at least he never told us anything. We were in the dark both me and Katniss. She didn't know anything, Caesar!" Peeta yells.

"I was going to ask of what you think about the war, but seeing that you are a little upset, we don't have to…"

"No, I can do it. I can talk." Peeta interrupts Caesar. He takes a deep breath and looks at the camera.

"I want everyone who's watching to think of what a civil war would mean. What will be left of our specie after it? Seventy-five years ago there was rebellion and what good that brought us? Death and ashes. That is what this rebellion will bring us again. Man, women and children dead. The districts reduced to ashes and ruins. Is that what you want?"

"So, you're asking for a cease-fire?" Caesar asks.

"Yeah…" Peeta nods his head, I don't if he's trying to convince the people or himself. "I'm asking for a cease-fire."

"Very well. So, there it is folks." Caesar turns to Peeta. "It was a pleasure to talk to you, Peeta." Peeta and Caesar shake hands then Caesar turns to the camera. "I believe it's all for now. We'll be back with our regular TV schedule."

The screen goes black and they're gone as fast as they came.

Wow. I wasn't expecting that. And sure as hell the people in Command weren't. It's starts as whispers but then they're shouting to the blank screen. The words they're shouting aren't for me. They're for Peeta. _Traitor! Liar! _NO! He's not a traitor. Why can't they see it? He's being forced to say that. He would never say that. _Traitor! Liar!_ The shouts keep going. I put my hands on my ears and try to hush the sounds. _Please! Please, make it stop! _

"EVERYBODY SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Everyone's quiet. "Can't you see what you're doing to sweetheart over there?" Haymitch points to me. I scowl at the old nickname, but secretly thank him.

"We need to go to the landing ground where the hovercraft will arrive or has already arrived." Coin says.

When we arrive there's so many that I get lost. I walk in circles with the stroller trying to find some familiar faces like Gale or Haymitch.

"Well, well look who came to greet us." Even though the last time I heard that voice I was eleven, it feels like it was just yesterday.

And I turn around.


	14. Chapter 14

**A.N. Have you seen Mockingjay? Isn't it perfect? I saw it more than a week ago and I want to see it again so bad.**

**I want to thank everyone who reviewed, favourite and followed this fanfic so far for your support. **

**Here's the so expected chapter 14. Now you will finally know who she encounter. **

**Enjoy and keep reviewing!**

**Chapter 14**

I turn to be face to face with Mrs. Mellark, Peeta's mother. I never liked Peeta's mother, since I know what she did to her three sons. When I would sell the squirrels to Mr. Mellark, I would always look at the window to make sure she wasn't there and if she was I would turn around and would come later. I know she's abusive to her sons, especially Peeta. I saw it the day when he threw me the burnt bread. I don't understand how she can do that to her own children and now that I have two of my own I understand it even less.

Besides her stands her husband, Peeta's father and her other two sons, Rye and Wheat. They are only two years apart from each other, Peeta being the youngest with almost eighteen years old, Rye with twenty and Wheat with twenty-two.

Rye looks like Peeta with blonde hair and blue eyes, but he has a different jaw and nose, the same Mrs. Mellark has. Wheat is the most different from the Mellark family with brown hair and characteristics blue eyes.

From what Peeta told me, Rye was always annoying for him because he knew that Peeta was in love with me so would always make jokes about it. Peeta would blush and tell him to shut up.

"Naomi, don't be rude. I'm sorry for my wife Katniss." Mr. Mellark replies. Mr. Mellark is a very noble and very kind man just like Peeta and very different from his wife. Before the games when Gale and I would come to the door behind the bakery to sell the squirrels he loved so much to him, he would always more bread than what we asked. On Prim's tenth birthday, when I went to sell him the squirrels he gave me a cookie and said to give it to my sister. I was very grateful since I didn't have any money to buy anything for her. I still don't understand how he can stand watching his witch of a wife beat up his sons.

"It's okay." I say, releasing a breath I didn't know I was holding. "I thought you were all dead."

"Guess what? We're not." Mrs. Mellark says bitterly.

I ignore what she said and carefully pick up the twins from theirs stroller. It's a little hard since they're two, but when you twins you have to get used to the hard stuff. When Graham needs a change of diapers, Daisy needs one too. When Daisy starts crying, Graham doesn't like it so he starts crying too. They always do things together. It's times like this when I think of Peeta. How would it be if he was here? Helping me take care of our children. It's so hard doing this by myself that sometimes I just want give up. But I don't because I know that the twins need me, they don't have anyone to take care of them.

Daisy and Graham just woke up from their nap so they're very calm.

"I believe you haven't personally met your granddaughter and grandson…" I say with a smile at Peeta's parents. "…and your niece and nephew, Daisy and Graham." I say to Peeta's brothers.

"You must have a lot of nerve for showing up here with those bastards. I bet Peeta is not even the father. I bet you don't even know who the father of those babies is and you only said Peeta is the father just to get his money. You're a seam whore! That's what you are!" Mrs. Mellark yells at me. I would slap her right in this moment if hadn't the twins with me.

"I don't allow you to call me that1 How dare you? Peeta is the father and I don't care about his money. I also won the hunger games, you know? I have the same amount of money Peeta has." I say. "I only slept with one person in my entire life and that person is Peeta. And just so you know it felt really good and I would do it again."

With all the yelling the started crying. I try shush them. When I raise my head I am meet with the palm of Mrs. Mellark hand.

"You little bitch!" Mrs. Mellark screams as she slaps me. She turns to Mr. Mellark. "How can you let her speak to me like that?" He just looks at his shoes. "I will not stand here and hear this seam scum say this things about my persona." She turns around and finally walks away.

After she's gone, Mr. Mellark comes to me. "Oh my god. I'm sorry. She's just a little sensitive since the bombings. I will go and put some sense into her. I'm sure we will have more time to meet our grandchildren." He gives me a kiss one the cheek and leaves me alone with Rye and Wheat.

There was an awkward pause until one of them break the silence. "So…Katniss I've heard a lot about you." Rye says. I laugh because of course they'd heard about me.

"I figured you had." I reply.

"I never thought Peeta would actually make it." He says. Make what?

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"Peeta got the girl of his dreams, the one he wanted so much and I was always joking he would never get. He sure as hell fooled me." He says chuckling a little.

"By the way, where is he?" Wheat finally says something and I wasn't for it. My smile falters and tears start to come to my eyes but I try stop them. _I will not cry. I can't cry. I need to be strong. For them. For their freedom. For the twins. For Peeta._

"Yeah. Where is he? I thought he was going to be here with you." Rye says.

"Peeta-" I try to find a way to tell them what happened to Peeta but words were never my forte that belonged to Peeta. I try again. "Peeta, uh, he was captured be the capitol. After I destroyed the arena. It's all my fault. They'd take him. And it's all my fault. It's all my fault. All my fault…" I repeat this mantra over and over, tears streaming down my face.

Rye and Wheat stand awkwardly in front of me not really knowing what to do with my crying fit. When they finally get out of their trance and come to me and embrace. "It's okay, sis. It'll be okay. I'm sure he's fine. We're here now, we'll help you. We're family now, right?" I nod and try to dry my tears on my shoulder.

"There you go. Feel better?" Rye asks and I nod again. "Okay, now let me hold this little one." He says towards Daisy and picks her up while Wheat holds Graham. I silently thanked them because my arms were starting to hurt.

I watch as Rye and Wheat start baby talking and make funny faces at the twins. I smile at their response at their uncles' stupidity.

In this moment I feel like I'm not alone anymore.


	15. Chapter 15

**A.N. I'm sorry for taking so long to update. I just didn't know what to write but now I have clearer view of how I want this story to be like. I'd like to thank for the reviews, the followers and favourites.  
**

**Happy holidays!**

**Please enjoy!**

**Chapter 15**

"Hey, Finnick. How are you?" I ask as I enter Finnick's hospital room. He still hasn't been allowed to go to a compartment by himself because he's very 'unstable' and can't think straight.

He shrugs his shoulders. "Bad." He blurts and looks up. "You look awful." He says with a little smirk.

"You have to have a lot of nerve. Did you even see yourself in the mirror this morning? You look hideous." I guffaw. We indeed look awful. Me because between having to feed the twins and the nightmares I probably sleep less than three hours. I have purple bags under my eyes, my reflexes are slow and I can't seem to focus on things long. Nowadays I don't even have strength enough to do my typical braid so I just let my hair down. Finnick also has bags under his eyes and his hair is dishevelled. We're practically twins. I and Finnick stared at each other's features and laugh.

After our laughter has quiet down I approach his bed and he moves to one side giving me space to sit beside him. "I know how you feel." I say and readjust so I'm sitting facing him. "But we'll get them out there. I promise."

Finnick starts tying knots on the net. I think it's a distraction and calms him down like a sedative. While he's tying knots he's not thinking about Annie, wondering what they're doing to her, if she's alive or dead.

Finnick's 'sedative' from everything that's going on is tying knots. Mine is the twins. They're everything to me and they keep grounded and sane. Plus other than the pearl they're the only thing I have of _him_.

I take care of them and I forget of what's happening in the Capitol even if it's for a short time. Because at night is when the nightmares come.

"Have you talked to Coin already?" Finnick asks bringing me out of my thoughts.

"Huh?"

"About a rescue mission for Annie, Peeta and Johanna. Have you asked Coin?" He repeats.

"Finnick, that's all I've been doing for weeks. I ask her everyday but she always looks at me with her eyes cold as ice like she's ready to kill me right there and without blinking says 'Miss Everdeen I understand you want Ms. Mellark safe in District 13 but a rescue mission is very costly and dangerous and we cannot afford to lose any soldiers at this stage of the rebellion.'" I reply frustrated.

There's a long pause. Finnicks ties knots and I stare at the grey wall in front of the bed.

"Where are Graham and Daisy?" Finnick asks changing the subject. I like this one better.

"They're with Rye and Prim." I say with a smile. Just the thought of my babies makes the world a lot of better.

"Rye?" Finnick asks confused.

"Rye is one of Peeta's older brothers." I clarify.

"Oh. So, his family survived the bombing?" Now I remember that nobody told him about the people of twelve being found.

"Yes, about eight hundred did. They arrived yesterday." I reply.

Finnick turns his head to me and asks bewildered. "How did they survive? Is it even possibly?"

"I guess. From what I heard, after the bombing they all went to woods, scared as hell because of the possibility of meeting some bear or wild dog but I think they preferred taking the risk than dying burned up. They just kept walking through the woods and made a camp. Tried to survived and hope by some miracle that a hovercraft came to saved them." I explain.

"What did they eat? It's been over a month since the bombing. And they all survived?" Finnick questions.

"Well, you do like to ask a lot of questions." I say jokingly. "But to answer them, they divide chores, some would go to the lake to catch fish and some would reap fruits from the trees and berries from the bushes. And no, they didn't all survived. How could they? They didn't know if what they were eating was poisonous or not."

Finnick nods his head in understanding.

* * *

"I need to go to District twelve!" I say as I enter abruptly in Command. Apparently Plutarch and Coin have meeting because it's just them who are in the room.

Coin rises her head to look at me. She looks kind of scary. "Excuse me, Miss Everdeen but we're in a private meeting. If you want to talk to me you have come later. Maybe after lunch I can meet with you." She says, her voice flat. Lowing her head again to read the papers. _I hate her so much._

"No. I need to talk to you now." I say, my voice booming through the room. This time not only Coin but Plutarch rises his head.

Plutarch shrugs his shoulders and turns to Coin. "It's okay, Coin. We were already finishing anyway. Talk to the girl." He organizes his paper and when he passes by me I say. "Thank you."

"You welcome, honey." He smiles softly, then exits the room leaving me alone with Coin. I try to ignore that he just called me honey because I got to know Plutarch this last few months and what learned is that he is just like Caesar Flickerman but fatter and less… colourful.

I try to arrange my train of thoughts and concentrate on what I've been here to say. I sit on a chair across from Coin.

"I need to go to District twelve." I repeat what I said when arrived in Command.

"Why?" She asks expressionless.

"I need to see what the Capitol did to it before I decide to be the mockingjay." I say determined.

Coin tilts her head to the side considering her options. After a while she looks at me and replies. "Okay." _Okay?! That was all I needed to say? _Coin is getting weirder and weirder. I guess she's really desperate for me to accept the role of the mockingjay that she would do anything.

"So you'll allow it?" I ask still a little hesitant.

"You'll leave first thing in the morning tomorrow, the hovercraft will be above watching you. You will be wearing an auricular all of the time. You must listen and obey to all orders they give you. Are we clear?" She declares.

"Yes, ma'am." I nod and turn to leave.

* * *

My stomach is grumbling and I'm starving. Is it time for lunch already? I raise my wrist to look at the watch. 12:30. After lunch I need to pick up the twins from Prim and Rye so I need to eat quickly. I go to the dining hall to pick up my lunch which is almost always the same thing: some kind of grey – seriously they must love that colour! – stew with chunks of meat, a thin slice of bread and a cup of water. The food is rationed according to age, sex and the job you have.

I get my food and head to the table that it's for the Everdeen, Hawthorne and now Mellark family. To my surprise I see that the table is full and there's only two seats empty. One for me and one for Peeta. I approach the table and sit beside Prim who is making funny faces to Graham. He's laughing so loud. That causes everyone to laugh too even Mrs. Mellark. I smile a little but I can't help but think that while we're here laughing with food on our bellies somewhere in the Capitol is Peeta. Alone. Probably beaten and dying. _Stop! Stop thinking about that! _He's not seeing his children grow. _Stop it! _I can't! He was the one that always wanted kids not me. He doesn't deserve this. It's not fair to him. He's the sweetest and kindest man in all of Panem. So why doesn't he get the good thing? Why all the bad? Tears threaten to spill from my eyes but I refuse to let Snow get to me. He won't. We will win this war and we will be free from his chains.

I eat quietly while the others chatter around the table.

"How are doing Katniss? I know how hard it is to take care of children when their father isn't around. I imagine how you feel when they still ask you lead this rebellion but I know how strong of a girl you are. You'll get through it." Hazelle says to me and in this moment I'm so grateful to have her in my life because it's people like her that I keep fighting. And that I will keep fighting until my last breath.

"I'm not good, Hazelle." I say honestly. "But I think I'll be. They are helping me." I say looking at my two perfect babies. "Thank you, Hazelle."

"Why?" She asks.

"Because you were always there." I reply.

"You welcome, sweetheart."


	16. Chapter 16

**A.N. I'm really sorry for taking so long to update, I didn't have time to write because of school exams and when I did I just didn't know what to write (A HUGE WRITER'S BLOCK!). Anyway, here's the new chapter. I hope you like it. I promise to not take this long to update.  
**

**Enjoy!**

**Chapter 16**

I believed that when I asked Coin to take me to District Twelve, I meant it. But now that the reality has settled in and I'm standing in front of what used to be the home I grew up, I have a huge urge to turn away and go back to District 13. _What am I doing here? Come on, Katniss. Think. _

I'm losing it. I kneel down hugging my knees and try to clear my thoughts.

"Start from what you know is true. My name is Katniss Everdeen. I'm seventeen years old. My home is District 12. There is no District 12. I was in the hunger games. Twice. I escaped. I got pregnant with Peeta Mellark's babies. I love them more than anything. Snow hates me. Peeta was captured by the Capitol. He was thought to be dead. H-He's not. He's alive..." I breathe deep. _What are you doing here?_ "I-I came to District 12 because..." _Because what?! _"Because I need to be sure! I need to know that choosing to be the mockingjay is the right decision. That what Peeta said isn't true. That if we choose to stop now, we'll be doomed." I hadn't realized I was crying until I felt the water of my tears on both my cheeks.

"Is everything alright down there, sweetheart?" The sound of Haymitch's voice is heard through my auricular.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I say as I wipe away my tears.

"Okay, I'm gonna pretend your saying the truth." I roll my eyes. "You have hurry up, sweetheart we're getting out of time. You have less than one hour before we go to Thirteen." Haymitch says.

"Okay, I'll be quick." I answer.

I get up from my knees and clean the ashes on them. That's all that's left of District Twelve. Wreckage, ashes and bones of people who didn't survived the bombing. About nine hundred and fifteen out of ten thousand people did. It's not even close to half of it's inhabitants.

When I arrived at the district, I kicked what I thought was a rock, but it wasn't a rock, it apparently was a human head.

Now as I walk through the remains of District 12 and the dead bodies, I just keep thinking. _This is my fault. I did this to them._ I look at corpse lying on the ground and think. _I did this to you. And to you. And you._

I come to a stop when I step on a familiar piece of metal. I raise my head and there is the Mellark's Bakery. Or what's left of it. That piece of metal must have been part of the oven.

_Don't cry. Don't cry._

I remember the times I spent in the bakery with Peeta and his brothers and father. The times when Peeta's brothers would make fun of him because of how he used to talk of me to his father when he was little and he would always blush.

I spent really good moments in that bakery. But that's gone.

Just like the rest of district 12.

* * *

Victors' village didn't change. I don't understand why they didn't destroy it? Maybe so when the reporters come to show to thwe people of Panem what they did to District 12 they have somewhere to stay.

I enter my house. It's dark and empty, without the cheerful spirit of my little sister in the air. The house is just like when I felt it for the games. There's something that doesn't feel right though, but it's probably all in my head. My crazyness taking its toll on me.

I go to my bedroom and in the chair that's in front of my desk is the leather brown jacket that was of my father. I put it on. It's been so long since I wore it. More than six months. When I was pregnant the only things that fitted me was Peeta's clothes and what Cinna designed for me. I couldn't even hunt. Now that my babies are not inside of me anymore, I can finally feel like myself again.

I take my game bag and go to my mother's room and put the only photo that I have of my father. It's my parents wedding day, they looked so young and happy. Even though my mother is still beautiful, the death of my father killed her and aged her, but in this picture her beauty shines through it. In this photo she doesn't have bags under her eyes and her smile is the most bright I have ever seen. My father is really happy aswell. And proud, I bet he never imagined that he could marry a woman like my mother, just like I couldn't believe that a boy as sweet and kind as Peeta could ever love me. Me, a starving girl of the Seam. It's really unbelievable. But I guess that's how love works.

I go downstairs to the kitchen and pick up some herbs to give to my mother at the hospital when I hear a noise coming from the window behind me. I turn around only to see the most ugly cat in the history of ugly cats.

"Oh great you're alive." I say rolling my eyes in disgust. I have no idea of how he survived the bombing and I really don't care. He hisses at me. He doesn't like me. I don't like him either, in fact, I loathe him. I should just leave him here to die.

_How could you do that to him, Katniss?_ Are you serious? Now I even hear Prim's voice in my mind. You got to be kidding me.

I pick the stupid cat and put in the bag. I have one last stop before I go back.

* * *

As I enter Peeta's house many memories come flooding through my mind. As pass through the kitchen I see one plate, one cup and one fork and my heart breaks a little because even though I spend a lot of time during the day with Peeta my mother allowed me to eat meals with Peeta.

I hold back the tears and climb up the stairs. I stand in the hallway, to my right there's Peeta's bedroom and to my left is Peeta's studio where he does his paintings. I get in his studio, I've never been here before because I wanted to give him privacy. It's full of paintings from many diferent things. At the back of the room there's painting from the first games just like the ones I saw at the Victory Tour. But there's new ones, paintings that I have never seen. Most of them is of me pregnant with my huge belly. I smile in all of them. One of the paintings makes me stop. It's of a baby girl and looks just like Daisy. My dark hair and Peeta's big blue eyes. I'm smiling but a few tears slide from my eyes. The baby in the painting is just the most beautiful baby. I remember now that Peeta would always call the baby she and her because he wanted a girl just like me. So he painted her not knowing how would she look or if even she was a _she_.

I go to one of the drawers in the studio and withdraw some colored pencils, a charcoal pencil and Peeta's sketchbook for when he comes back to me. He will have something to draw his real children with, in District 13.

I close the door of Peeta's studio and walk to his bedroom. I come to a stop when I see right on the top of the bed is white rose. _Snow. _He's been here. I begin to feel nauseous and sick because of the intense smell of the rose. I grasp the white rose in my hand, open the window and throw the repulsing thing away. This a message from Snow. I can just hear his voice in my head.

_I can find you. I know where you are. I am always watching._

I move to Peeta's closet and open it. I am overwhelmed by the scent of him. It's been too long since I smell the fragance of him, a mixed scent of bread and cinnamon. I put in the bag as much clothes as I can, mostly his shirts. I'll give it to him when he comes back. I have hope.

I close the door of the house and now I know one thing.

It's time to fight. For our future.


	17. Chapter 17

**A.N. Sorry for the delate. I will try to update soon again.  
**

**Chapter 17**

_White. _

_The colour invades everywhere I look. Snow's falling from an infinite sky. I can't see where I am. Just white snow. Too much white. I am wearing a white silky nightgown that falls to my feet, whose are bare on the cold snow._

_"Katniss..."_

_A familiar voice pronounces my name. It's barely more than a breath. Barely a whisper as the person seems to weak to speak._

_"Peeta." I say the name of the voice it belongs. "Where are you?"_

_"Katniss."Peeta repeats with the same weakness as before. "I'm here." I look around for him but find nothing but bright white snow._

_"Peeta. I can't see you." I say, panic settling in my voice. "Peeta, please I need you to tell me where you are."_

_"I'm here, Kat. I'm here." He responds._

_I start to run. Everywhere and anywhere I look, trying to find him in this big, giant blanket of white._

_I scream his name, tears streaming down my face. I receive the same answer over and over. 'I'm here, Kat. I'm here.' But he's nowhere._

_I surrender to exhaustion_, _I lay on the icy snow and close my eyes with Peeta's sweet voice in the background like a lullaby pulling me to sleep._

I wake up gasping for air and panting, sweat covering my entire body like a new layer of skin. I look at the clock beside my bed. 5:58 in the morning I know I won't be able to go back to sleep now.

I have been having this same nightmare since my visit from dictrict twelve. One week ago.

After I arrived from Twelve, I knew that I need to be the mockingjay. For my children. For their future. But there was something that I couldn't stop thinking about, that if I accepted the role as the mockingjay Peeta would suffer. That night I couldn't sleep, I just stare at the ceiling the pearl in my right hand and tears on both my cheeks.

I got up and gently put my sleeping babies in their stroller. I needed some fresh air. As I walked through the halls of thirteen I saw the back of a head covered with blonde curls. Prim.

"Prim! What are you doing awake at this hour?" I yelled and she turned around to face me.

"Katniss, I was called to go to the hospital for an emergency. A woman was in labor. What are _you_ doing here?" She asked.

"I-I went for walk. I couldn't sleep." I answered.

"Do you want me to walk with you? I was going to the compartment but I could stay." Even though I wanted her to get some sleep, I needed someone to talk to. And it's been long since I had a moment with my sister.

"Yes, Prim I would like that. Do you mind?" I asked her hopeful and tired.

"Of course not, Katniss. You're my sister and I haven't seen you for ages. I miss you." Tears slid from her big blue eyes and I had to look away to not cry too. Stupid hormones. I always hated to see my sister cry.

"I miss you too. Don't cry, please." I wipe away her tears and she nods. "Come on, let's take a walk and talk."

Prim leaned in and gave a kiss to each cheek of the twins. I pushed the stroller and started walk. "Do you have any news, Prim?" I asked changing the subject.

She turned to me beaming and said. "Actually, I have something to tell you. I got promoted in the hospital. They're training me to be a doctor."

"Oh, Prim." I said hugging her tight. "They'd be stupid not to. I'm so happy. Finally something is going right."

"And you. Are you okay?" She asked.

I shook my head. "You know I'm not. How can I be? And now they're pressuring me to be the mockingjay. I can't be because of Peeta and I can't stop thinking what will happened to him after the war is over. But I need to be the mockingjay because of them." I point to the the stroller where the twins are sleeping. "Because I die a thousand lives just thinking of my children's names in that bowl. I don't know what to do,Prim."

My sister stayed quiet for while before she spoke. "I don't think you understand the importance you have in this war."

"What do you mean?" I asked confused.

"I mean you can ask anything and they have to obey."

* * *

"I accept the role of being the mockingjay." I said to the room full of people in Command the next morning. The room burst into gasps of relief and claps of happiness. I didn't know most of the people in here except Plutarch, Coin, Boggs, Gale and Beetee.

"But I have some conditions." I pronounced.

Coin tilted her head to the side and hesitantly said."Okay... Do tell."

I took from the back pocket of my trousers the paper where I had written my demands. I started to read. "Gale and I will be able to go hunting and all the game that we catch will be given to Greasy Sae in the dining hall." Various whispers started some of approval and some of disagreement. Ignoring the noise I proceeded. "Gale will be always by my side no matter what. My sister gets to keep her cat. And all captured Victors - Johanna Mason, Annie Cresta and Peeta Mellark - will be recued at the earliest opportunities and they will be granted immunity should the rebels win the war." There was a long pause. Coin looked at me with aversion until she said one word.

"No."

I felt heat on my face as the anger started to grow. "The Victors will be granted immunity and you will announce that in front of the entire population of thirteen and the remaining of twelve. You will hold yourself and your goverment responsible or you will find another mockingjay!" I almost yelled.

"That's it. That's our mockingjay. That's what we've been waiting for. The fire. The spark. We need her." Plutarch said to President Coin. She stayed quiet before she said.

"Anything else?"

I looked at the paper one final time before answering. "I will kill Snow."

That made Coin smile wickedly. "We will flip the coin then."

* * *

Plutarch stood up and claspped his hands together. "This is perfect, Katniss. We need to start shooting _propos _right away." His cheerfulness was making me sick.

"What the hell is _propos_?" I said a little to harsh.

"Propos are propaganda shots. They are communicated messages to Panem's citizens, giving statements against the Capitol. We will be meeting with Fulvia Cardew. She's my assistant and she came with me from the Capitol."

In the afternoon of that day, I left the twins at my sister's care and went to do my first propo. Let's just say that it didn't went very well. Because the lines they gave me weren't very espontaneous.

So with the help of Haymitch they decided that the only way for me to be genuine in the propo is to go into the combat zone in District 8. Great, I thought, now they want me to get killed. One one hand I thought they were right, that that was the only way for them to shoot a propo without me looking like a complete idiot but on the other I thought that it wasn't just me anymore I had people that depend on me, people that I loved. That was my motivation. The departure was schedule for the end of the week at 9 a.m.

* * *

Today is the day that I go to district 8 to shoot the propo. After I calmed down from the weird dream, I get up to see if the twins are awake. Fortunely, they're asleep so I can take a quick shower and then prepare Graham's and Daisy's things for day and night because I don't know long I will be out or at what time I will arrive and if I arrive late at night then they will sleep at mom's and Prim's compartment.

After I do all that I go to the twins cribs and find them wide awake with their hands in their mouths. They must be hungry. I go to the mini-fridge and pick up two baby bottles. I hold Daisy and Graham and put the bottles to their mouths to feed them at same time. I did this so many times that for me it's absolutely normal and easy.

After I feed them I put them in their stroller and go to the dining hall for breakfast.


	18. Chapter 18

**A.N. I'm sorry for taking so long to update but with school and everything I didn't have time to write anything. This chapter is different from the books and has a twist and a cliffhanger at the end. I hope you like it.**

**Chapter 18**

"Katniss you're wanted in Command." I turn around in my seat in the dining hall to find Boggs, big and tall, behind me. He looks at me emotionless.

"Why?" I ask suspiciously. I look at Gale who's sitting across from me silently asking him if he knows anything about this. He answers my question by shrugging his shoulders.

"That's confidential information, miss." He looks at the people sitting in the table, the Mellarks - except Peeta and his mother who apparently still doesn't like to eat in the same table where the 'seam rats' eat -, the Hawthornes and me since my mother and Prim take breakfast and all the other meals at the hospital. "Now, I will escort you. Soldier Hawthorne, you will have to come too."

Gale nods his head, kisses the top of Posy's little head and stands up. I stand up too and push the stroller to the grey hallway that directs to the Command, Boggs leading the way on the front, Gale behind me.

I have a feeling that this is not going to be good.

* * *

Her back is straight and her eyes are steady as she says. "Miss Everdeen, I called you here because we have received an information from our spies in the Capitol that there's going to be a special anouncement today. We believe that President Snow will speak and Peeta Mellark will be there too. It will happpen tonight after dinner. I advice you to come to Command and watch but do not bring your children. I'm certain your mother and sister won't mind watching them for a while. And soldier Hawthorne you are also expected to be here tonight. We do not know will happen. That is all. You are free to go." After she finishes her little speech, Coin sits down and starts writing and looking on some papers, ignoring us completly.

I really hate this women. There's something about her that doesn't feel right. Something that's dark.

I stay standing on the same place for a few minutes looking at Coin and trying to reason to what she said. I feel sick to my stomach just thinking about how bad Peeta's appearance will be or what are they going to be saying.

When I come back to myself I put my hands on the stroller and turn around to leave. The only sounds on the hallway are of the wheels of the twins stroller spinning and of my footsteps and of Gale's behind me.

Suddenly Gale stops, grabs my arm and turns me around. We stand in front of each other silently- my head downcast and my eyes looking at the floor- until he speaks. "I know what you're thinking Catnip. I can't promise you that tonight, Mella- Peeta will be in a better shape than the last time you saw him. But what I can do say is that that guy is tough even if I don't like him, I can see that. I have seen his games and I know how hard it is to love someone when they don't love you back. It hurts like _hell. _And even though he knew you didn't love him he fighted with every string of his body to get you back to your family. That's what great men do, they think of others first rather than themselves. I admire him for that." Finally I lift my head for my eyes to meet his and I regret it instantly. His eyes are so sad that I feel my heart tighten and my chest hurting and tears threatening to spill from my eyes. Tears start falling from his.

I lift my hand to his cheek and wipe away his tears. "Gale, you have been my best friend and companion for so many years and I love you. But I don't love you the way you love me and I wish I could. I love you like a brother and I love you deeply. You know that the person who holds my heart is Peeta and miserable with out him. But I'm miserable without you too." I stop talking to hug him tightly. And I do what I thought I'd never do.

I cry like a baby.

* * *

"Do you want to go hunting?" I ask Gale. After recuperating from my breakdown I went to Rye's and Wheat's compartment and asked them if they could babysit the twins for little while. I don't like asking people to baby sit my babies because it's my responsability to take care of them not theirs

"Sure," He shrugs and pulls up his sleeve to look at his schedule. "I still have some time until the training sesson."

After hunting I went to the kitchen to deliver all the game we hunted and then went to pick up the twins. I spend the rest of the day with them, making stupid faces to make them smile, telling them stories my father told me when I was little- even knowing they don't understand me-, singing songs, changing their diapers and feeding them. I really have the happiest babies ever, always smiling. They're so inocent, nothing like me.

Before I know it it's time to go to Command. I leave the twins with Prim since she has the off of the hospital and make my way to Command. My hands are sweating and shaking as I turn the door knob to enter the room.

Everyone turns their head to look at me and I feel the heat rise to my cheeks. Coin breaks the silence. "Miss Everdeen, I'm glad that you decided to show up." I roll eyes and stit down. I look around and see that Gale has already arrived. I also see Haymitch seated in one of the chair far from me.

"How'y doin', sweetheart?" He asks me, clearly drunk.

"I thought you weren't going to be drunk again." I told him.

"I wasn't going to but then that happened." He says raising his long finger to the tv monitor, referring to the announcement.

Suddenly the tv turns on and President Snow appears. He's wearing a all white suit aswell as his white rose. He looks right at the camera and starts speaking.

"Hello, Panem!

Tonight, I will make a special announcement for our rebels but specially for Katniss Everdee, known to the rebels as the mockingjay and to the Capitol as the girl on fire. To me is known as for the girls who loves to destroy and kill everything in her way. Have you seen all the people that she killed? She loves it."

He is such a liar. He say I love kiling people but he knows that I killed people to save myself and Peeta and that he's the real killer. Thinking of Peeta, where is he? Coin said he was going to be there and he's not. Haymitch sees my expression. "Calm down, sweetheart, just listen 'til the end." I nod and look at the screen.

"She hunted animals in the woods of District 12 but from now on she will be the animal and she will be hunted." He looks right at the camera, his eyes are dark. "I know that you had your birthday not long ago and I'm sorry I didn't give you a gift. So let's call this a delated birthday present.

Have a lovely night, Miss Everdeen." He smiles darkly right after he gives me a good night and the screen turns off.

I stand up and look at the people around the room. "What is he talking about?" I ask. I feel the panic rising. Everyone is silent until Haymitch speaks. "I don't know, sweetheart. I don't know." He says shaking his head.

The phone next to Coin rings and she answer it. "Hello? Yes." She's quiet for a while before she says. "Are you sure?... Okay, they will be there right away." She ends the phone call clearly annoyed and looks at me. "Miss Everdeen, it seems the guards have seen a male person with characteristics similar to Mr. Mellark at the underground entrance of District 13." She turns her face to Gale. "Soldier Hawthorne, you are authorized to escort Miss Everdeen to the main entrance."

Gale nods. "Yes, ma'am."

"Aren't you coming too?" I ask Coin.

"No. I have more important things to do." She says and sits down and starts writing on some papers. She's such a bitch!

I'm in complete shock. What hell is happening?! Gale grabs my arm and drags me out of the room.

"It will take a few minutes to get to the entrance so you better pull it together. It might be Peeta but it also might not be. We'll go and see. okay?" He says.

"Okay." I nod.

We turn many hallways until I see that entrance at the end. The doors are opened and one guard is one each side of it. On the threshold a human form appears. It's dark and you can barely see the person. But suddenly the light shines on the person.

It's Peeta.

I start to run, calling his name.

"Katniss?" He says.

**A.N. So...Did you like it? Please review and tell me. What do you think should happen to Peeta? How should he react to Katniss? I really need to know your opinion. Thanks for all the suport.**


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